Don't Listen to the Career Services Department if They're Giving you Crappy Advice

Go straight to the source with an informational interview.

Who should you ask? (source)

Because even the most well-intentioned people can lead us astray, it is important to be thorough in your research – career-related and otherwise.

Take, for example, my friend Carl*.

In college, Carl decided he was interested in a career in computer forensics and investigating cyber crime.  So Carl followed conventional wisdom and visited his school’s Career Services Office. It turned out to be the wrong decision.

Being Brave Feels a Lot Like Being Scared

There are a lot of things to aspire to in this world. The words aspiration and ambition are everywhere.  Somehow, during the early years of our adult lives, we are most vulnerable to the sense that we should all be striving for something bigger, better, faster, brighter . .  more.  But what exactly is that?

Scary can be courageous.  (source)

 It’s no secret that, now more than ever, one of the keys to success is to have hustle. By now we've all discovered that we have to figure out what we want and pursue it aggressively.  But you barely have to type the words “how to choose a career” into a Google search (which turns up about 1.4 trillion results in less than half a second, by the way) to find scores of advisors who say the ticket to professional happiness is simply to discover what you’re passionate about and then do that.  

Yet the relentless pursuit of passion is about as useful as a butter knife in a sword fight if you don’t know what your passion is.  And not surprisingly, there are few employers willing to pay a living wage for someone to devote their professional energies to self-discovery – although if you know of one, please share.

So I think it's time to free ourselves from the concept of passion and embrace another concept: bravery.  

Think About Your Money Like a Millionaire

On MSN Money this morning I came across an interview with Steve Siebold, who has spent nearly 30 years interviewing the world’s wealthiest people, and is the author of “How Rich People Think.”  

What is your freedom?

One of the things Siebold talked about was what his research has identified as a shared characteristic among self-made millionaires: 

“A prevailing trait among the wealthy people . .. is that they have a '“really positive relationship with money. They think about money in terms of freedom, as opposed to the negative relationship a lot of people have with money.'"

Let’s look at that again: wealthy people think about money in terms of freedom.

Invest your money - just not in shoes

On a whim - and a break from looking at holiday cookie recipes - today I searched for the word “Invest” on Pinterest.  One of the pins that popped up was a picture of a pair of Chanel ballet flats with the caption “if you’re looking to invest in a classic.”   

I promise you that I love shoes as much as the next gal, and I can amortize each wear of a $200 pair of jeans in about 8 seconds.  Even so, the first thing that crossed my mind when I saw that pin was: Chanel ballet flats are so NOT an investment.

A sound investment?

More precisely, shoes are not an investment.  Everyone remembers our fictional soul mate Carrie Bradshaw.  She spent nearly $40,000 on shoes, and ended up having to ask Mr. Big for the down payment on her apartment when her building went co-op.  

Carrie may not have ended up using the money Big gave her, but still . . . That! Right there! That’s the thing we're trying to avoid.

A Good Job is Not the Same as a Good Career

Whether or not you're happy with your current gig may have a lot to do with whether you view it as just a job or as a career.  That is because the qualifying components for good careers are wildly different than for good jobs.

I once spent months in a position where I could think of nothing but getting out and where my discomfort with the position actually manifested itself into physical pain.   The cause of my intense dissatisfaction, I now realize, was that I viewed the gig not just as a job, but as part of a career I thought I was building (obviously, not the right career). 

But the identifying characteristics of a good career are wildly different than for a good job.

Professionals who are unchained . . . from the desk

For years, I have had a desk job.  Had I thought about it, I would have realized that I would prefer not to be sitting down 8, 10, or 12 or more hours of the day.   It must have been that I just figured most "good" jobs were desk jobs and that, statistically, I would wind up among the sitting.

I settled into my early professional life as a desk jockey without much resistance. Then, I started noticing all the professionals who work not only with their minds but with their entire bodies. Oh, the luxury to move!

For those of you who are just starting out in your careers, are looking for a change, or who simply daydream about an occupation where your tailbone doesn't ache from the sitting, after the jump is a list of jobs to get you out from behind a desk.

13.1; It Feels Better If You Practice First

It is no secret that my goal-setting skills are somewhat lacking.  That I married someone who is among the mere 3% of super-humans who sets goals then actually achieves them is yet another baffling gift from the universe.  

Despite my substantial deficiencies in the goal-setting arena, every now and then I make a plan and try really really hard to stick with it. Like in 2008, when I planned to run a half marathon every year from then until I turned 40.*  So far I'm sticking (acceptably close) to this goal, and a few weeks ago ran my fourth annual 13-miler. Except that this time I did it without training.  Not surprisingly, I don't recommend that strategy. 

An Open Letter to my Desk Chair

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Dear Office Chair Model B4061,

I realize neither of us wanted it to come this far.  I don’t doubt that at 6:45 on Tuesday morning you would have been happy not to have awoken to me booting up my computer and proceeding to sit, squirm, perch, and recline on you with little reprieve until well after sundown. And please believe me when I say that when I finally left your company at around 10 pm on Wednesday night I was not sorry to see you go.  But considering that you and I have spent no fewer than12 hours a day in direct contact with each other for the past week, I think it is time to have The Talk.  

What I learned by giving up my car

Mercedes Benz runs ads in Southern California with the motto "Around here, you have to love what you drive." They're right. It is not unusual for Southern Californians to have an hour long commute to work. Combine that with another couple hours or so of running errands and circling parking lots trying to find a parking space, and it makes sense that people want their car to be comfortable and reflective of their personal style. 

I love cars, and always have. Even before I had a drivers license I could identify a Mercedes E-class based on the shape of the headlights, explain the difference between 4, 6, and 8 cylinder engines and spot changes in a car's body style from year to year. So when this San Diegan moved to Boston last year it was with more than a little reluctance that I gave up my car.  Cold turkey.  

I never in a million years expected that giving up my car would be one of the best things I've ever done. Here is why I love being carless:

First, I save a ton of money. 

There are obvious savings: no car payments, no insurance payments, no maintenance costs or tanks of gas to buy. 

But some savings are not so obvious. For example, I buy less stuff.  When I go shopping I'm conscious that whatever I buy I will have to carry home - a trip that involves at least one subway ride and a 7 minute walk up a hill to my house. That means that when debating whether to buy something I'm lukewarm on, be it clothes, shoes, or decor for the house, I weigh whether I really need it and if I like it enough to lug it all the way home (and potentially back to the store if I want to return it). Often, the answer is that it isn't worth the hassle.

Having to carry what I buy also means I buy fewer groceries (I can only carry about four canvas bags).  In order to focus my grocery shopping, I make a weekly menu and only buy what I need. This is a big deal for me because I am not very effective at the grocery store. Left to my own devices and with no list I wander the aisles and am likely to leave, still hungry, having only bought peanut butter, apples and ice cream. 

The list helps immensely. It also means that I don't waste as much food because I actually have a plan to eat everything I buy.  According to the Natural Resource Defense Council, Americans throw away an average of 20 pounds of food each month, at a cost of $28-$43.  Assuming I waste 80% less by only buying what I can carry, I can save $400 per year. 

I get more exercise. 

I estimate I walk an average of 4 miles per day post-car. I've always been active, but my legs were actually sore from walking during the first few weeks. From my house to the nearest subway station is just under half a mile; the nearest bust stop is only 200 yards closer.  Regardless of where I want to go or how I ultimately get there, my journey starts by walking.  

I get to enjoy my neighborhood. 

Since I'm new to the city, walking has been the perfect personal introduction. The view from the sidewalk is much different than the view from the street.  As I walk by beautiful old houses and parks nestled into the avenues, I notice details, flowers and people that I wouldn't otherwise see.  Driving those same streets requires focusing on the road, signs and lights, and it feels like another city. From a car, the human element of the city is minimized. 

I realize that not every city is all that pedestrian friendly. Southern California certainly isn't. It isn't practical for everyone to give up their car completely, and I will likely own a car again in the future.  But I'm glad I have the chance to live life without a car for now, and I encourage you to think about ways in which you can use your car less and use your legs more. You might be surprised by what you discover!

How to Succeed in College in Seven Easy Steps

This time of year my otherwise normal city is overrun with 70,000 college students. Between now and Labor Day thousands of people in UHauls descend upon us and unpack acres of suitcases and Swedish furniture. This is what my street looked like last year, lined with SUVs and moving vans:

Watching the mad rush makes me think about college.  I remember that the internet was still new when I went away to school; it was years before anyone had an iPod or had heard of Google.  Which makes me realize that I am now old.  And then I start to think about how time flies and how it all seems like yesterday, and I come dangerously close to binge buying overpriced exfoliating creams and Ellen Tracy clothes but I'm still in my early 30s so I gather myself and make it stop. 

My youngest cousin is among those starting college this week, and I'm finding it hard to resist the urge to indulge in a little bit of the "if I knew then what I know now" brand of reminiscing.  So for her, and everyone else headed to campus this fall, here is some important and enduring advice that would have served me well, had I paid attention: 

1. I get that you love Shakespeare, we all love Shakespeare.  But for the love of g*d take an economics class, maybe even two.  
2. Start finding ways to look great on paper.  No matter how awesome you are in person, looking great on paper is what gets you admission to grad school, the interview you want and/or the loan you need to pay for it all.   
3. Don't sign up for the credit card just because they give you a free t-shirt.
4. Seek out and sign up for opportunities to travel, volunteer, build something, meet people, explore industries or connect with your fellow humans.  Leave your home, your state or the country.  Take a semester off of school to do it if you have to.  Studying abroad in England in hopes of meeting and marrying either Prince Harry or Pippa Middleton may be acceptable as long as your trip also includes one or more of the other listed activities.   
5. Try not to eat ice cream every night, or every other night.
6. Devote energy to the nerdy kids, the curious kids and the hard workers. They are the people who will change the world.
7. Get a lock for your bedroom door. At one point or another your roommates will probably allow their drunk friends to pass out on your couch and odds are better than even that those drunk friends will wake up in the middle of the night and mistake your room for the bathroom.  Plan accordingly.

I promise you this can change your life.  Ok, the last one might not actually change your life, but it will keep your closet from getting mistaken for a toilet.  So there's that.

If you have additions to my list, feel free to jot them in the comments.  I'm sure the hundreds moving into my neighborhood would love to hear it.  And they'll totally listen.  I swear.