Money questions to ask before you say "I Do."

I'm sure you'd agree that there are plenty of things in coupled life to disagree about without adding money to the mix.

Ask these questions before you get hitched.

Still, disagreements about money are one of the top causes of divorce in this country.  So in the name of matrimonial money harmony, I've pulled together some of my favorite money discussions to have with your partner before you go around buying jewelry and putting down a deposit on a reception venue.



1) Let's talk about debt, baby!  As your partner if he has any.  Find out what type of debt it is (student loans, credit cards, car loans, personal loans, payday loans, gambling debts., etc.) There are tons of ways to owe someone money and you need to know who your honey owes and how much. Then find out the interest rates and how he expects to it all them off (i.e., whether he expects you to help or to pay for most of the other bills while he pays it down, etc.).  You have to know his plan before you can know if you want to be on board with it.

2) What's your number?  I'm talking about your credit score. Knowing how creditworthy you partner is can be important when you start making big purchases - like a new car or your dream house.  You're entitled to check your credit scores for free each year.  So make a little date of it.  Slip into something comfortable, pour some wine, and cozy up to a computer and log on to any of the several sites that gives you your FICO score for free.  Then let the sharing begin.

3) What would you do if you won the lottery?  This is a fun conversation starter with friends, but with your partner it can be a helpful window into his relationship with money.  Listen carefully to his answer.  If he launches into a list of the stuff he would buy himself but doesn't even mention setting something aside for the future, helping loved ones or giving to charity, don't be surprised if he does the same with his holiday bonus or your tax return.  Figure out if you can live with the type of spender he is.

4) Is he bringing home the bacon? It's a bit gauche in polite conversation to ask someone how much money he makes. But this is your soon-to-be life partner.  You are entitled to know how much money he earns at his current job.  You're also entitled to know whether he is happy earning that amount or if he wants a raise or intends to get a job in the future that makes more (or less) money than he currently earns.  Meet his honest answers without judgment; if he is comfortable with his current income and doesn't show much ambition to earn more that's his choice - and it's a perfectly valid one - but you have to decide if you can live with that.

5) Prenup or not? Believe me, this is a touchy subject, maybe best to dip a toe before jumping into the deep end.  First, spend some time thinking about whether you want a prenup. Do so me research to help you decide.  Whichever way you come out, you need to talk to him about it.  He may expect that you'll have one and if you're against it you'll have to reach agreement.  Or he may be opposed to it but you want one.  However you both feel about it, educate yourselves about the options and come up with a plan together.

These aren't the only important money conversations to have before getting married, but they're a good place to start.

Any other things you think you'd like to know? Please leave them in the comments.